Best Humor from the Net from Dobhran's Humorama!
Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and
who was responsible.
Body Nazis: Hardcore exercise and weightlifting fanatics who look
Chainsaw Consultant: An outside
expert brought in to reduce the
Cube Farm: An office filled with cubicles.
Idea Hamsters: People who always seem to have their idea generators running.
Mouse Potato: The online, wired
generation's answer to the couch
Prairie Dogging: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
SITCOMs: What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. Stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.
Squirt the Bird: To transmit a signal to a satellite.
Starter Marriage: A short-lived
first marriage that ends in divorce
Stress Puppy: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
Swiped Out: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.
Tourists: People who take
training classes just to get a vacation
Treeware: Hacker slang for documentation or other printed material, such as books.
Xerox Subsidy: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.
Alpha Geek: The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. "Ask Larry, he's the alpha geek around here."
Assmosis: The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.
Chips and Salsa: Hardware and
software, respectively: "Well, first
Flight Risk: Used to describe
employees who are suspected of
GOOD Job: A "GetOutOfDebt" job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again.
Irritainment: Entertainment and
media spectacles that are annoying,
Percussive Maintenance: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.
Uninstalled: Euphemism for
being fired. Heard on the voicemail of
Yuppie Food Stamps: The ubiquitous $20 bills spewed out of ATMs everywhere. Often used when trying to split the bill after a meal: "We all owe $8 each, but all anybody's got is yuppie food stamps."
Seagull Manager: A manager who
flies in, makes a lot of noise,
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